BRB, going to jail.

Robert Downey Jr and his son Indio in West Hollywood





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This kid is 14 years old. FOURTEEN. They didn't make them like that when I was that age. I mean, I know who his father is, but wow. I need to stop. I feel like Chris Hansen is going to pop up from behind my laptop right now.

"Why don't you have a seat over there..."

One more pic:


I'm too scared to type anything else. I can't believe I looked over RDJ's weird ass outfit and weird little manpurse (seriously dude, you've got Iron Man money right now. Get a nice leather bag or something) to stare at his undearage son. I'm having fantasies of marrying RDJ and being that kind of stepmother. Lord.

Got em.

This weeks Entertainment Weekly has Shia Labeouf as part of Hollywood's new A-List. Well, durr. Shia is on his grind. But this little tidbit surprised me a lot.



Career Box Office: 2.33 BILLION
Asking Price: 10 million


Excuse me while my gold-digger ways come out: WHAT THE HALE!!!! TEN MILLION A PICTURE?! I SEE YOU, SHIA!

Oh my god. Oh my fucking God. It's happening. He is officially blowing up. Except for the whole Walgreen's thing (which, you know that didn't even really count to me. It made him more endearing), he hasn't fucked up yet. Professionally and in his personal life. He has some really good movies lined up. Eagle Eye looks amaaaaaazing.

Dude, I know there's a lot of girls on your jock. Just a little piece of advice: if it's about to go down, and she's all "Oh, we don't need a condom, I'm on the pill", DON'T DO IT. YOU'RE ABOUT TO CATCH A CASE. Hell, for 10 million a picture, even I'm not above a little you know, "security".

Lol at this issue having Channing Tatum and Columbus Short as "on the rise" actors. I like them both but seriously. They have been trying to make Channing happen for the past 4 years now and it's not going to happen [/Regina George]. He's going to be the new male Gretchen Mol (it was fun, Wes Bentley!!). Also, I can't get over the fact that Columbus had sex with Britney Spears. Besides we all know that Collins Pennie is going to take over Columbus's spot anyway. Well at least so. He looks to much like Lee Thompson Young for him not to be big in my mind. I'm still saddened that LTY never broke out.

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Let us all take a moment of silence.

I never thought that this would happen in my lifetime. I especially didn't think this would happen when I was nineteen.

Never have I been more excited for this country. Isn't it funny how everyone else around the world is rejoicing and people here are acting like it's the end of days?


Shallow note: How hot is Michelle? She was working that purple dress. Ahh I love her.

Thievery!

John McCain's "new" slogan:



Hmm. That slogan and that image...I feel like I've seen it somewhere before. That's because I have! John McCain and crew have been straight up swagger jacking Obama! "A Leader We Can Believe In" sounds a fucking lot like "A Change We Can Believe In". Not to mention the background of that image looks just like Obama's campaign logo:


Let's not forgot Sen. McCain's "Yes We Will" bullshit. If I was part of the Republican party, I wouldn't really be energized about my candidate and the election right now. When the best you can do is steal stuff from the black dude, things aren't really looking up. Oh my god, the debates are going to be hilarious. McCain's temper is legend....wait for it...DARY and Barack is cool as a cucumber in these types of situations.

Let's see Sen. McCain try to steal Obama's "unofficial" campaign poster:

I just can't wait to be king.

That last post with Nick got me thinking about Jason Weaver. What is he up to? I looked on his IMDB page, he's got up few movies lined up and I'm assuming he's still working on his music. This? Is not enough for me. I am in love with Jason Weaver. I always have been and always will. What is it going to take to make him more famous? Do I have to write a movie with him in the starring role? Call Kelly Rowland so she can start dating him so they'll be on YBF and C&D (because we all know the only way to get more famous is to start fucking someone ELSE that is famous)? Shit, do I need to round up all of the players from Smart Guy and do a reunion show? BECAUSE I'LL DO IT.

Oh my god. He is my future. and we ALL KNOW dude has got some secret bank laying around. If you don't know what I'm talking about let me remind you with two words:
LION KING


That's right. I'm going to get me some of that Simba money, CHHHHUUUUCH. And let's not forget that it is Disney money. That's the kind of money that doesn't go away, okay?!

It's like seeing a unicorn in real life.

I logged on this morning and saw something about Mariah and Nick on MSNBC. I didn't know MSNBC did gossip pieces, but whatever.

In the month since Nick Cannon’s became Mr. Mariah Carey, he’s racked up some high-priced purchases. But who’s really paying for them? According to the National Enquirer, all the designer duds and other treats come courtesy of his new wife’s bank account.

“Nick’s having a field day with Mariah’s moolah!” a friend of the diva told the Enquirer. “His head is spinning with the possibilities her black Amex card affords. For now, Mariah is being indulgent with his spending spree, but at the same time, it’s sent up a red flag.”

Shortly after the wedding, the actor-rapper was even seen test-driving a $120,000 Maserati Quattroporte. “He already has at least six luxury cars, including a Rolls-Royce Phantom and a Cadillac Escalade,” the insider said. “So why would he need another set of wheels? He’s taking advantage of Mariah’s generosity.”

Another Mariah pal points to Nick’s wedding bling, a heavily bejeweled band, as the sort of thing he expects Mariah to provide. “It’s garish and tacky — and yet another example of Nick’s extravagance at Mariah’s expense," the source told the magazine. “It’s as if Nick is trying to spend as much as he can as fast as he can — because deep down he knows the gravy train could stop at any time.”

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Well, durr to this last part. I'm pretty sure Nick knows what the fuck he is doing. He's going to get all the shit he can before this turns south. I don't really understand this relationship. I mean, really Mariah. It's Nick Cannon. BUT this is the happiest I've seen her ever. She is glowing in every picture I've seen her in ever since they've got married. I mean it could be because she is using some expensive ass moisturizer made up of baby foreskins or something, but I think it's because she's in loooooove. Whatever. Nick just needs to make sure Wild N Out season five comes out soon. As much as I think Nick is an assclown, that show makes me laugh like no other.

I don't believe you. You need more people.

Usher on the cover of July's vibe

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You know what? If it was anyone else, I would find this commendable. People talking shit about your wife? The mother of your child? You tell them what the fuck is up. But there is just STANK written all over this so no matter what Usher does or says, I don't believe his ass. It all just reeks of phoniness and fakery.


But yeah. I'm glad a magazine is going to tackle the Chris Stokes issue. That news came out HARD and then died down (Hmmm). Now that's a story I believe.

David Cook on Best Week Ever.

I don't really follow American Idol that much anymore. I haven't really paid attention to it since the Fantasia days, but this David Cook fellow is so cute to me right now. I don't know what it is.

David Cook BWE
by mjsbigblog

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I am usually not attracted to dudes who look like him at all. But there is something about him. Now this could be my golddigger ways coming out because A) he just won American Idol and is now semi-famous and B) is about to make some serious bank, but I really think it's his personality. Whatever. Someone needs to tell him that Kim Caldwell is not famous enough to be his girlfriend. He needs to fuck someone on his level. His people need to call, oh, I don't know, Christina Millian. She's pretty and SHE DESPERATELY needs the publicity.

Really?

John Mayer posted blog #433948 on the subject on haters. And if that wasn't fucking enough, he brought The Goonies into it.

THE GOONIES SWITCHEROO


Go back into the annals of beloved '80s films, and you'd be hard pressed to find a movie closer to the hearts of thirty-somethings than The Goonies. I'll spare you the synopsis, as you most likely already know it, but if you don't, no need to worry - you've seen 20 other movies like it in its time. The template: nerdy but affable underdog(s) suffer unrelenting ridicule by jocks in varsity letter jackets but ultimately have their comeuppance, usually stealing a smoking hot girlfriend or two in the process.

In the case of The Goonies, a band of akward, socially outcast kids set off to find a buried treasure, narrowly averting almost certain death and outrunning, among others, a popular high school jock named Troy. Troy is one of the classic cinematic archetypes of the 1980s; the jock. He's good looking, rocks a period-relative badass Mustang convertible, and he's a total prick. All we can do from the moment Troy enters the frame is to wait with baited breath to see Troy lose and the Goonies win.

And in that end, back in 1985 when the underdogs had their day, (and their bag of jewels), and the final credits rolled and we called our parents for a ride home, we realized something fantastic: It's true, we weren't Troy. But for the first time, thanks to The Goonies, we no longer wanted to be Troy. It was okay to be us, thank you very much.

Cut to present day.


What happened to the better part of a generation that once walked out of their local theater rooting for the Mikeys and Chunks and Datas of the world? They've turned into Troys. Troys who can't accept the differences in others and condemn the things they don't understand. Finger-pointing, shit-talking Troys.

Ask yourself: with whom do you identify more these days, Troy or the Goonies? And if you're reading this and you happen to be an Internet shit-talker, could it be because you think I'm Troy? Because honest to God, I've always fancied myself a Goonie; the underdog who toppled over the narrow-minded naysayers and walked away with a treasure.

So maybe this whole thing is one big misunderstanding and it turns out we don't need to go down as a generation remembered as having spent the '00s wearing our asses like hats after all. Maybe it will turn out that we needed a little time to figure out that in the end we're all just a bunch of Goonies.

JM

POSTED BY JOHN MAYER AT 05:37 PM FROM LOS ANGELES, CA

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I don't understand when this shit started to happen. It wasn't even like this when he dated Jessica.

People are going to talk shit. That's a given. But really? It shouldn't even matter. You're successful! Isn't that enough? Do you really need to try and make everyone like you? Not everyone is going to like you John. You don't need everyone's approval. Things have a way of balancing themselves out. Someone says your music sucks? You win an assload of Grammy's. People talk shit about how unattrative or you are? You fuck Jennifer Aniston. STOP TRYING SO HARD. STOP IT. You don't have to do this shit! Just keep making records like Continuum and everything will be fine. Jesus.

I used to eat up everything you did, and now I'm just turned off by everything you do and say. It's all about the music. Do you remember that? Try and keep it that way.

Oh my Lord.

Corbin Bleu singing the national anthem. I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING. He sounds terrible. I cannot believe he sounds that bad. Corbin stans there is now way to spin this. He sucks at singing.

I am rewatching Chris Brown's VMA performance to rid myself of Corbin's fail.



source: AHM and youtube

What is going on with you!!

I don't know even what to say Zoe. You started out so good, you had so much potential. I wanted to be you. This haircut is stupid. You are wasting your head.

Please be on some crazy Mars drugs to explain this. Because right now, you're just FAIL.







And you just know she thinks it looks good. Ben Foster was probably all, "Oh, baby you look so good" or some shit. I'm done.


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